Walk Worthy Press: Sanctuary

Author Testimony

I have learned how to trust in God and that is my testimony. Psalm 37:7 says "Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for him." This is a lesson that God has taught me many times over throughout my life. If I would submit every situation to him first, He would do things in my life beyond my wildest expectations. He has used the most significant events in my life to get my attention.

I grew up in church singing and performing for the congregation at the tender age of five. Raised in an extended family of ministers, singers and church musicians, it took many years however, for me to develop my own personal relationship with God.

I grew up a quintessential middle child in a family of four children so I learned early on to be independent and self-reliant. I believed that if I wanted opportunities all I had to do was to work hard to make things happen and I would be in control of my own destiny. Hard work is great but God had designs on my life and he allowed challenges to unfold in it until He got my attention. He started with a whisper.

I knew that God loved me. It was under the tutelage of my beloved uncle, the late Bishop Lloyd E. Swaringer and Greater Gethsemane Apostolic Church that I began to learn about salvation and the precious gift of the Holy Ghost. It was in his ministry that I saw how God responded to faithfulness, humility and love. Somehow, however, I still did not equate how an all-knowing omnipotent God could be concerned with the cares of life of someone so ordinary like me.

Immediately after high school, I prepared to enter college. One week before I was to arrive on campus for my freshman orientation, my funding had fallen through. I cried for days before even thinking about going to God in prayer. My twenty-year-old brother who was paying his own way through college said, "Get your things packed, we are going anyway." So my family prayed about it and drove to South Carolina State University completely on faith. When we arrived on campus, my mother presented the letter only to be told that it was sent in error and that my bill for the year was paid. God whispered, "Trust me."

After graduation, I moved to Charlotte, North Carolina. I foolishly thought I had it all under control. I made the right career moves working in the home furnishing and real estate management industries. I was married to the love of my life, living in a beautiful home in the right neighborhood. I was achieving everything that the world told me was important to be a real success, but God saw that I was empty and unsatisfied, in pursuit of things that didn't really matter.

A few years into our marriage, my husband and I decided to start a family. Having been raised in a loving home, creating a family of my own was a priority for me. I went to the doctor as a formality and during a routine examination; he found that clusters of tumors had invaded my body. I was faced with infertility issues that could only be rectified through a series of surgeries.

I submitted to the surgeries but they didn't work. I submitted to expensive fertility medications. That didn't work either. It wasn't until I submitted to God that things began to change.

My husband was very supportive but my constant disappointment took a painful toll on our loving relationship. I felt life a failure. On July 4, 1994, my husband tearfully bid me to kneel with him at our bedside as we prayed and sought God about our situation. Again, I had to completely depend upon God instead of my own devises. This time, God spoke a little louder, "Trust me." I cried at my husband's side as we prayed a powerful prayer ending it with, "Whatever thy will is God, we will accept it." That day, I decided to cast my cares upon the Lord. God used this situation to call me even closer to him. No external thing, no relationship, no child or career could fill the gaping void in my life. I stopped taking the medication and stopped worrying about a baby. Exactly eight months and two weeks later to the day that I put my trust in Jesus, my first child, son Braeden Alexander was born.

I walked away from my professional career when God blessed us with our daughter, Brinn Elizabeth. It was an incredible financial sacrifice but I believed that God was directing my path. We sold our new house and brought a smaller, older one. We also got rid of the SUVs, trading them for unimpressive fuel-efficient used cars. But, I believed that if I was faithful in my home, with my family, and trusted in Him that He would direct my path as he had done so many times in my past. I began to pray for God to inspire my creativity. A part of me that had gone unchallenged in the staunch business world. He answered and I co-created a spiritual giftware and home accessory catalog business that I ran from home.

Then, one day during a consecrated week of fasting and praying, I nonchalantly mentioned to my two-year-old daughter that I wish I could write a book as I was strapping her into the car seat. I smiled at her toothless grin as I continued with my errands. Later that week at a Friday night service, my Pastor called a prayer line. As he began to pray for me in the spirit, he said, "Sister Bailey, you are going to be published." It was if the words that I had spoken to my infant daughter had gone from my mouth directly to the ears of God.

I sat on the front pew and cried. I knew that God was confirming that I could accomplish the impossible if I would simply trust in Him. I tossed around ideas for months to no avail, beginning to allow doubt to creep in. Then, in the wee hours one morning, I was awakened from my sleep with the desire to pray for someone else. Immediately after praying, God inspired an idea that became my first book, Twelve Principles of the Gilded Nest. I was so excited about the message that was stirred in my spirit that I decided to self-published the book. Then I began to get calls from various organizations asking me if I would come and speak about the book.

While I felt so blessed with what God was doing in my life, I desired and prayed to God to allow me to share my message with more people, through broader publishing channels. There He was again, God telling me that if I would be obedient and trust in him, he would allow my aspirations to take flight. Several years later, my local library called and asked me to introduce a phenomenal new author who was coming for an event. It was an author who had just released another top selling book with Walk Worthy Press. I gave her a copy of my book that night asking for her feedback and to my surprise, she called me back a week later.

She wasn't sure why she had accepted the invitation to travel to my city but she felt unusually compelled by the Lord to come. At her urging, I sent a copy of my book to Denise Stinson, completely unaware of her solid reputation as one of the most accomplished professionals in the publishing industry. After several conversations, Denise decided to publish the book under the Walk Worthy Press banner, changing the name of the book to "Sanctuary."

Again and again, God continues to show me that as I learn to trust Him more and more through every challenge, he will take me to higher heights and deeper depths. It is my hope, that as I continue to speak and write books, sharing the goodness of Jesus Christ, that others will be encouraged to love, trust and obey God too.

Pamela J. Bailey

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