Author
Testimony
I have learned how to trust in God and that is my testimony. Psalm
37:7 says "Rest in the Lord and wait patiently for him." This
is a lesson that God has taught me many times over throughout my
life. If I would submit every situation to him first, He would
do things in my life beyond my wildest expectations. He has used
the most significant events in my life to get my attention.
I grew up in church singing and performing for the congregation
at the tender age of five. Raised in an extended family of ministers,
singers and church musicians, it took many years however, for me
to develop my own personal relationship with God.
I grew up a quintessential middle child in a family of four children
so I learned early on to be independent and self-reliant. I believed
that if I wanted opportunities all I had to do was to work hard
to make things happen and I would be in control of my own destiny.
Hard work is great but God had designs on my life and he allowed
challenges to unfold in it until He got my attention. He started
with a whisper.
I knew that God loved me. It was under the tutelage of my beloved
uncle, the late Bishop Lloyd E. Swaringer and Greater Gethsemane
Apostolic Church that I began to learn about salvation and the
precious gift of the Holy Ghost. It was in his ministry that I
saw how God responded to faithfulness, humility and love. Somehow,
however, I still did not equate how an all-knowing omnipotent God
could be concerned with the cares of life of someone so ordinary
like me.
Immediately after high school, I prepared to enter college. One
week before I was to arrive on campus for my freshman orientation,
my funding had fallen through. I cried for days before even thinking
about going to God in prayer. My twenty-year-old brother who was
paying his own way through college said, "Get your things
packed, we are going anyway." So my family prayed about it
and drove to South Carolina State University completely on faith.
When we arrived on campus, my mother presented the letter only
to be told that it was sent in error and that my bill for the year
was paid. God whispered, "Trust me."
After graduation, I moved to Charlotte, North Carolina. I foolishly
thought I had it all under control. I made the right career moves
working in the home furnishing and real estate management industries.
I was married to the love of my life, living in a beautiful home
in the right neighborhood. I was achieving everything that the
world told me was important to be a real success, but God saw that
I was empty and unsatisfied, in pursuit of things that didn't really
matter.
A few years into our marriage, my husband and I decided to start
a family. Having been raised in a loving home, creating a family
of my own was a priority for me. I went to the doctor as a formality
and during a routine examination; he found that clusters of tumors
had invaded my body. I was faced with infertility issues that could
only be rectified through a series of surgeries.
I submitted to the surgeries but they didn't work. I submitted
to expensive fertility medications. That didn't work either. It
wasn't until I submitted to God that things began to change.
My husband was very supportive but my constant disappointment
took a painful toll on our loving relationship. I felt life a failure.
On July 4, 1994, my husband tearfully bid me to kneel with him
at our bedside as we prayed and sought God about our situation.
Again, I had to completely depend upon God instead of my own devises.
This time, God spoke a little louder, "Trust me." I
cried at my husband's side as we prayed a powerful prayer ending
it with, "Whatever thy will is God, we will accept it." That
day, I decided to cast my cares upon the Lord. God used this situation
to call me even closer to him. No external thing, no relationship,
no child or career could fill the gaping void in my life. I stopped
taking the medication and stopped worrying about a baby. Exactly
eight months and two weeks later to the day that I put my trust
in Jesus, my first child, son Braeden Alexander was born.
I walked away from my professional career when God blessed us
with our daughter, Brinn Elizabeth. It was an incredible financial
sacrifice but I believed that God was directing my path. We sold
our new house and brought a smaller, older one. We also got rid
of the SUVs, trading them for unimpressive fuel-efficient used
cars. But, I believed that if I was faithful in my home, with my
family, and trusted in Him that He would direct my path as he had
done so many times in my past. I began to pray for God to inspire
my creativity. A part of me that had gone unchallenged in the staunch
business world. He answered and I co-created a spiritual giftware
and home accessory catalog business that I ran from home.
Then, one day during a consecrated week of fasting and praying,
I nonchalantly mentioned to my two-year-old daughter that I wish
I could write a book as I was strapping her into the car seat.
I smiled at her toothless grin as I continued with my errands.
Later that week at a Friday night service, my Pastor called a prayer
line. As he began to pray for me in the spirit, he said, "Sister
Bailey, you are going to be published." It was if the words
that I had spoken to my infant daughter had gone from my mouth
directly to the ears of God.
I sat on the front pew and cried. I knew that God was confirming
that I could accomplish the impossible if I would simply trust
in Him. I tossed around ideas for months to no avail, beginning
to allow doubt to creep in. Then, in the wee hours one morning,
I was awakened from my sleep with the desire to pray for someone
else. Immediately after praying, God inspired an idea that became
my first book, Twelve Principles of the Gilded Nest. I was so excited
about the message that was stirred in my spirit that I decided
to self-published the book. Then I began to get calls from various
organizations asking me if I would come and speak about the book.
While I felt so blessed with what God was doing
in my life, I desired and prayed to God to allow me to share my
message with more people, through broader publishing channels.
There He was again, God telling me that if I would be obedient
and trust in him, he would allow my aspirations to take flight.
Several years later, my local library called and asked me to introduce
a phenomenal new author who was coming for an event. It was an
author who had just released another top selling book with Walk
Worthy Press. I gave her a copy of my book that night asking for
her feedback and to my surprise, she called me back a week later.
She wasn't sure why she had accepted the invitation to travel
to my city but she felt unusually compelled by the Lord to come.
At her urging, I sent a copy of my book to Denise Stinson, completely
unaware of her solid reputation as one of the most accomplished
professionals in the publishing industry. After several conversations,
Denise decided to publish the book under the Walk Worthy Press
banner, changing the name of the book to "Sanctuary."
Again and again, God continues to show me that as I learn to trust
Him more and more through every challenge, he will take me to higher
heights and deeper depths. It is my hope, that as I continue to
speak and write books, sharing the goodness of Jesus Christ, that
others will be encouraged to love, trust and obey God too.
Pamela J. Bailey
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